1. "Stick out your lower lip"

2. "Raise your eyebrows and shoulders simultaneously"

You're doing the Bof like a born Parisian! Now you can say "I don't know," or "I disagree with your idiotic opinion," or "not my fault," without resorting a single solitary French word.

Tourism officials have issued a guide to Parisian gestures as part of a recent ad campaign to convince potential visitors that Paris isn't just a city of museums; it's also a place where you can go and be rude to the locals in order to be like the locals.

My personal favorite? Has to be Les boules:

1. "Hold an imaginary pair of tennis balls, one in each hand"

2. "Put your hands in front of your neck, as if you were holding your lymph nodes"

Now, I've never held my lymph nodes, so I might not get it right the first few times, but I'm going to have to try this one out the next time I go. Les boules, I'm sick of all this art. Les boules, if I have to walk through this beautiful city any longer, I'm just going to puke. Les boules, les boules.

Quite honestly, I've never had any one be rude to me in Paris. Every guy I've ever spoken to has been incredibly tolerant of my horrible broken French. And what's wrong with museums?

I know it's not the case, but I harbor a secret (or not so) hope that this is just a sneaky way to get the obnoxious to keep their mouths shut and blend.

Or Camembert.

To learn more, go here